Jenn LeBlanc
(jennleblanc)
Alumnus/Alumna
Metropolitan State College of Denver
Jenn's Personal Page
Joined: Aug 19, 2006
| Posted: Jul 9 2007, 6:23 pm
IMHO:
1:strong
2:almost
3:almost
4:almost
5:strong
6:strong
7:strong
8:almost
9:strong
10:no
11:almost
12:strong
13:strong
14:no
15:almost
16:strong
17:no
18:strong
19:strong
20:no
21:strong
22:almost
23:almost
24:almost
25:strong
26:strong
27:strong (though repetitive w/26 unfortunately, unless you restructure the essay, because it is the only one other than the mother that has more than one photo for a single subject)
28:strong
29:strong
Maybe it is too broad? The two skating pictures bring me to think how well you captured the loneliness and void of the unused skating rink, in two pictures. But as a whole essay I wonder about the congruity, it seems to be all over the place. Maybe if you focused on one thing in each town i.e. the roller rink in Veyo, the playground in Kaibab, etc. if you choose different elements form each town, the strongest elements of loss, or the most obvious missing pieces. So you don't have 3 towns where the focus is on the schools, but on three separate things. Does that make sense? Just looking at your cutlines and pictures I would lay it out this way: Beryl: RR station or county school Ploche: mineVeyo: Post Office or town cleaning guy
Rockville:family ranching
Henreville: main street (keep in mind that video rental started in the LATE 1980's so unused for decades is a bit of a stretch)
Glendale: family
Paragonah: businesses
Kaibib: historical places
Hurricaine: working farms
Does that make any sense? I think you are so all over the place it would help you to break down the project into very specific sections to be able to see it for what it is and to be able to edit it to the most powerful selections.
Another option would be if you just take it by town pieces: family, work, business, religion, education, law, transportation, and then fit a picture into each of these sections for each town.
I think if you break the story down and rebuild it with strict guidelines it will end up being more powerful and understandable. I hope that helps a little bit, if at all, I know my brain tends to be in a million places at once so hopefully there is something useful.
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Jenn LeBlanc
(jennleblanc)
Alumnus/Alumna
Metropolitan State College of Denver
Jenn's Personal Page
Joined: Aug 19, 2006
| Posted: Jul 12 2007, 7:13 am
Yes, I agree. The more often you fall on your face the more you know you don't want to and hopefully the harder you try:better you get etc..etc..etc... I'd really like to see what you decide with 49 in the end. I have thought about doing something similar in SE Colorado where my family came from and the homesteaders are still there trying to survive.
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Christopher Onstott
(cponstott)
Alumnus/Alumna
Washington State University
Christopher's Personal Page
Joined: Dec 9, 2005
| Posted: Jul 13 2007, 9:03 am
This isn't your A-typical photo essay, more of a long term project piece so I'll be adding to it as I shoot more towns but I don't plan to pull many out. Each town I shoot has its own mini-photo story, so this is a compilation of images from the collection that conveys the IDEA of a small town rather than the verbs of individual small towns.
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